Here’s an excerpt from a story I’m currently writing.
I could almost sense the fragile aura of sadness encase Jessica as she pulled out an envelope from her bag, which she swung around and unzipped as it clung onto her should with one strap. She handed it to me, the crispy autumn wind shoving my hair in my face. Uncertain, I reached out and grasped it, hesitant as if it was risky to take the envelope.
Our conversation had been normal and light before, but the sudden pain I sensed in her gave the atmosphere a freezing, solemn feel, like the obligatory silence at funerals.
The envelope looked like it had been flapped open and close violently over and over – the fold on the verge of morphing into a tear, the envelope crumpled and tinted a light tan, barely darker than my own skin. It had an undertone of light blue – probably the envelope’s original complexion – which struggled like a withering crop.
I glanced at her then slid out the letter, rustling gently against its vessel. Unfolding it, I scanned the letter, written in a neat, cursive hand that, in itself, was a work of art.
Three quarters of the school break have passed and I haven’t accomplished most of the things I had aimed to, and neither have I posted anything here.
Time has been so precious that I feel like I can’t sit down and work on something tedious and get engrossed in it for long like I used to. I haven’t drawn anything, haven’t worked on my fictional language and only encountered holiday homework a few times. Instead I’ve been working on the novel I may have mentioned a few times in this blog.
In June 2009, I began working on a novel called The Tracker Clan, writing in an old exercise book. The storyline stretched on slowly and I eventually used 6 exercise books. I realized it was progressing too slow and started typing. I stopped when secondary school started, planning to continue in June. Then – I distinctly remember the date – on the 23rd of June, my old computer died and along with it went my 40,000 words. I put the writing on pause until December when I started The Elemental Thief, stopping at the start of 2011, intending to continue it in June – now. But when the holidays came, I started working on a third novel, abandoning the previous idea.
Justin Ortega and The Curse of Testuberm follows a teenager, the titular character, as he explores a planet called Tesseria. The story itself is quite complicated so I left it out.
Anyway, as I said, the excerpt above is from the first page of the book, which has only 29 pages; I’ve been working very slowly, churning out about two pages a day, adding up to 6,500 words. I kept getting distracted by FaceBook and YouTube. My bad.
I’ve also been reading the last book of the Percy Jackson series and I think Rick Riordan’s writing has influenced mine, though I don’t hope to be as good a writer as him. It’s a wonder how he created such an intricate storyline where everything connects magically and you can’t find a loose end. I think if I had a storyline even half as complicated as his, I’d get lost in my own writing!
Anyway, I’m posting the excerpt to get some opinions. Would you want to continue reading the book if this was the first page? Does it interest you or is it too stale? I can’t judge it myself because… I just find it hard to tell when my work is bad. Please post your comments to let me know what you think!
[I’m predicting I won’t get any comments, for some reason.]